I was scrolling through twitter when I came across a post I just had to click on:
A lot of her words remind me of my own journey. How I went through the gamut of anger, guilt, resentment, pity, joy, happy, satisfaction.
The odd thing is you can logically know certain facts but even if you’re a logical, intelligent person the hormones of a mother are overpowering and you’re left feeling overly emotional and perhaps even guilty over how things are going.
I worry about my sister, soon to be first time mom, and I want her journey to go smoothly. I was lucky, I never had any troubles with the mechanics of breastfeeding, never had mastitis. My only problem was not producing enough milk and not wanting to take the leap into getting my boys to put the demand on my body to make enough. My wish for my sister is that her journey will go how she wants it to go.
The ironic thing is how intense your emotions can be during such a short period of time. In the moment it feels like perhaps the world could end, like everything is riding on the next hour of your life. But now? Now those handful of months are a memory. Luckily the good overshadows the stress and I’m happy with where we are.
But being in the moment, feeling those intense emotions, especially guilt, is so, so difficult.
Why is it that the package of breastfeeding always comes wrapped in a bow of guilt?