I never posted a picture of my family on Mother’s Day. But here it is. Our family of five is growing up right before our eyes. Thank goodness my mom thought to group us together and snap a shot because this was the only picture of us together for the whole day.
I’m still on the fence about the whole idea of Mother’s and Father’s days. While the kids are young it’s just so much work for the spouse (and a lot of families don’t even have a spouse to help out!). It’s great to have a day where you feel special, get a thank you for all the work that you do and get to have some pampering. But in reality it’s just a lot of pressure and expectation for things to go smoothly. And it puts so much more work on the spouse than a regular weekend.
Joel made sure all the boxes were checked off this year:
- He got up with the kids while I stayed in bed an extra half hour (we had breakfast reservations with family and I wanted to actually put on makeup so I didn’t lounge around in bed).
- He made sure the kids each drew a picture to give to me and bought them a card to sign and give to me.
- He bought me flowers and gave me a card to say thank you for being an awesome mom – or at least a thank you for not ditching our family and leaving him to raise the kids.
- He got the kids ready for the day so I had time to myself to get dressed, brush my hair and apply makeup.
- We went out for a nice breakfast with all four grandparents as well as Joel’s brother and his wife and he took care of Alice’s diapers while we were out (including a poopy diaper change in the van).
- I got a nap later in the afternoon, no questions asked, while all the other adults entertained the kids.
- I didn’t have to do any cooking or dishes all day.
The other things Joel took care of for the day:
- Breaking up fights over who got to be first.
- Changing all the diapers for the day.
- Repeatedly saying to the kids “Remember who we’re honoring today. Remember to say thank you. Who’s special day is today?” while they continued doing whatever annoying things they were doing.
- Walking “Mr. Tantrum” around when we were sitting down for breakfast and the seating arrangements weren’t ideal in the toddler’s world.
- Spending 80% of the time we were at breakfast with “Mr. Tantrum” in the car, trying to get him to calm down before being relieved by Papa so he could come join us at the table to eat his own breakfast.
It was not the best meal out we’ve had as a family but it probably won’t be the worst by the time our kids are grown. I tried to enjoy my meal and be thankful we had so many adults with us to help but it’s hard to relax when you know what your husband is dealing with.
AND during all of that Joel and I never really got to have a conversation with our own mothers about how grateful we are for all the sh*t they dealt with while raising us!
Joel did everything he could to give me a good mother’s day but in reality the whole thing was just exhausting and it was hard to stay positive about it. I’m grateful we are all in good health and I am so so blessed to have so many family near us who can help with our kids and are fun to be around but GEESH is it too much to ask to have a day with no fighting?
I got on the chat boards that night with our twin club and many moms had similar experiences (or worse including bloody head wounds!) and we all just had to raise a virtual wine glass and give a toast to ourselves for making it through another day that was all about us.
Luckily for Joel his turn comes next month when Father’s Day arrives. I’ll keep you posted on how that goes.